Monday, August 31, 2009

quick update: Smelling Food

I have found a weird delight. Not a torture thing I promise you. I have sort of 'craved' foods lately. My husband made a french dip dish. I opened the bread and smelled it like I would lavender or a rose. I love lavender but would hate to eat it.

I've taken this opportunity to get 'satisfied' in just smelling like a flower. Finally the husband said "okay, I need to eat that you know" but it was such an amazing smell, and I could swear I got 'full' off of it.

R1P2: Day 20 of VLCD

Weight: 264.6 lbs (For a second I thought i went up.)
Loss of: .2 lbs
Total Loss: 19.2 lbs

If it wasn't for the every other day of 1.4 I think I would be depressed.

Lunch:
Tuna (albacore white w/ water)
Salad

Apple for snack

Dinner:
Cod w/ lemon and dill
cucumber salad - vinegar, dill, mustard powder YUM!

I'm not sure why I have those fluxes. I mean, they have a rythym. Big, small, big, small. NOt really a big big small, big small small big big. I mean: Big small big small.

Anyone have this before? I'm eating on protocol and I don't have 1 food that slows me down over another. Im going to try a test of eating the exact same thing today as I did yesterday. Or maybe put a control down today. I'm craving a nice grapefruit in the morning. But I want to try eating 4 days exactly the same w/ the same water and see what happens. If its more my body or I'm missing something in my food that I happen to put in every other day. Which is weird.

I've lost a roll of fat, so I know I'm lossing inches.
My mother is asking me to go to the gym w/ her. She doesn't want me to lose my muscles. I understand. But I still think it's funny trying to tell someone who is so in to exercising that I have to be careful.

I'm tempted to ask to get measured, but I know I will get funny looks from the lady. Your really only suppose to do it once a month there. I need her to teach me how to measure.

anywho.

Sunday, August 30, 2009

R1P2: Day 19 of VLCD

Somehow I mixed up the days. hmm. It really is day 19.

Weight: 264.8 lbs (It was nice to see another number besides 266.:P)
Loss of: 1.4 lbs
Total Loss: 19 lbs

So something is going on with my body here it seems to 'hold weight' for a day then dump. At least in the last several days I have had more then a pound of loss. I'm good. heh.

I had a scare. I ran out of HCG on Saturday morning, but luckly the refill was waiting for me up on our way to the bbq. nice.

I'm happy for the loss.

If I can, I have decided not to quite before Thanksgiving. I have not been a big fan of thanksgiving really. Lots of food and that seems to always be the American focus. Food food food. You see it everywhere and it's being pushed, and being overweight makes me want to say ENOUGH! I hate holidays that seem surrounded by food. It's always about the meals. I guess most people could eat normal, but do we? hmmmm. It seems like we waste ourselves all year to lose 5-10 lbs so we can eat like little piggies on these special occations. Why do our 'good food habits' seem to Nationally go out the window. And if you choose to lighten up a little, your ruining traditon, or your being a spoiled sport. I hear about it in a lot of families that have a person dieting. I have heard of so many daughters being sabotaged by their mothers for some reason. Don't your want your daughters to grow up to be cowboys? oops. wrong rant. hehe. Er. I mean, healthy? heh. The sins of the mother's (and I bet some fathers) should not rest on the shoulders of the daughters. I remember reading about one lady that got all hell from her mother for trying to loss weight. LIke lossing weight was rejecting the family. :S

Luckily I have very supportive sides of the family. So far everyone has been very nice and helpful. I got to eat with my parents tonight and had to explain to my mom several times that 'no, I can't eat beans, no not that either. um, only 3.5oz of that." They want to buy some lean meat at the store for next time. They are supportive but still a little hazy on the exactness of it. My dad went through some fruit selections. I'm like, nope just the 4. They were so proud of me.

It was funny. I told my mother in law that I don't eat cucumber really because for the weight and size of what you get it looks unfilling. Tonight I tried the cucumber salad with my fish. FILLING! I'm going to have to grab a couple cucumbers I gave back to her today. I made a KILLER cucumber salad. I simply used vinegar (it was one flavored with herbs and nothing else), lots of dill and some mustard powder! YUM! I almost forgot about it because it was in a bowl
OH! hehe. So my mom had these big dinner plates set out, I grabbed mine and traded it for a small lunch plate. It does make a difference. It helps make the eyes get appeased. :D I think I will make the cucumber again with fish. They seem to go well. My dad sliced them w/ a mandaline VERY thin. I could also make shreds I bet.

Had a tuna salad for lunch- yummy. again mixed with some vinegar, dill and some other spice.. not sure what it was again. hmmm.

Well, off to watch a show with the husband I think, but I'm in the mood to cuddle up with my grapefruit and a book in bed. LOL

anyone notice if they have problems eating right before bed? I like the snack and I don't get hungry by bedtime.

Saturday, August 29, 2009

quick update

I went to a BBQ surrounded by:
Many sausages, 3 cakes, about a dozen bowls of chips, hamburgers, watermelon, cheese chilli dogs, and my protocol food. Guess what I ate? :D :D :D Totally stayed on protocol. Oh, and a huge ice tub full of ciders and beers.

Someone brought this amazing cake that they decorated with little mini's. It was so cute, but I really didn't feel like HAD to have some.

I even was asked only once if I wanted to try a chip. Sounded yummy. I said no thank you, end of that. YEAY!

I was good. I didn't manage my food as well. We got there around 2pm, I had already eaten my lunch, nibbling away on apples, and then I think I ate my dinner around 5pm. I drank a LOT of water and finally left around 9:30 and dived into my grapefruit in the car, though only seemed to need 1 slice. I LOVE HCG! 1 freaking slice helps you feel better. :D

I saved the rest for a little midnight snack while finishing a show. We are dragging our laptop into bed with us to watch our tv show w/o kid. Grandparents took him for the night! NICE! Thank you grandparents for putting up with our kid! :D It's so nice to have that in my life and get a night off.

OH- I asked the husband- when I'm on P4 I would like him to take me to a hotel for a weekend getaway and order room service in the morning. I LOVE room service. On our honeymoon I got the chickenpox, had to stay in the hotel and eat room service. I Don't think I could have had a better time! LOL. anywho.

R1P2: Day 19 of VLCD

Weight: 266.2 lbs
Loss of: .2 lbs
Total Loss: 17.6 lbs

WoW do the pounds not want to drop this week. Is it safe to assume that we can have a small dump in the middle? Or is this abnormal? At least I dropped .2 right? heh.

Fustrating. I was hoping for at least a .8-1.2 drop this morning. So close to 20 lbs.

Lunch: Chicken and Salad
Snack: Ate an apple
Dinner: Steak and Asparagus (same as the night before)
Missed out on a grapefruit, but had a lot of water.

Today is a BBQ, bring your own meat and a side dish. I plan on bringing fish and cucumbers. Maybe even asparagus.

I do see my face getting smaller. My friend said that my shoulder area was looking thinner plus neck. So, this is going to be a top down affair? :) Though I do see some strinking in my top stomach bulge. It is definably going away.

In the last seven days I had a 4.4 lb drop. No other diet would give me that. Plus drop inches in the most amazing places. I'll take it, grudgingly because this is the hCG diet. As someone said... we do get spoiled on this diet.

I haven't been hungry, though it's been a little tough this week seeing other's food, some cravings have kicked in, but not tempted enough. :) So that makes it well worth it.

Wish me luck for today.

Friday, August 28, 2009

R1P2: Day 18 of VLCD

Weight: 266.4 lbs
Loss of: 1.4 lbs
Total Loss: 17.4 lbs

YEAY! I was thinking that today I had to loss if it was a simple 'water in the fat cells'
It is very comforting to read Pounds and Inches over again and seeing what he talks about. I knew I wasn't going to do the apple day. I rather just wait for the drop then put myself through 6 apples. LOL.

I have enjoyed putting an apple in my afternoon snack. I can just linger and most time I don't finish it. It's my tie me over snack.

Last night a friend came over and they made my favorite- French Dip and macaroni & Cheese. I just put my nose in the mac/cheese and took 3 good smells. My goodness it was like eating it. It almost made me full just smelling it. Then I made myself a steak and asparagus. OMG! That was such an amazing dinner. I told the guys that it was the perfect replacement to the french dip.

I'm going to attempt to measure myself, but I'm not great at consistancy in placement. I go once a month to the gym to get measured, but I will just try what I can today and compare numbers. heh.

I'm happy for the loss, as I stepped on the scale I kept saying "just don't gain on me okay!" and it did better. I want to get back to the 1lb average. I'm at .97. I would love to be 200 by the start of November. Yes that is 66 more pounds, but we will see. It's a wish. I would love to be in a size 16/18 outfit for Halloween!

Lunch: Lettuce and Shrimp again. Very filling and yummy. I didn't over season it, just plan with some garlic and lemon.

snack: apple

Dinner: Steak and Asparagus very lightly seasoned with lemon, steak with some mustard powder and garlic.

Snack: 1/2 grapefruit that I stringed out till bed.

anywho

Thursday, August 27, 2009

possible reason for stalling

I concider anything under the .6/.8 loss a stall. :)

I read Pounds and Inches and feel a bit better:

Page 67: This could be it. Water retention due to fat cells! I HOPE!
The weight registered by the scale is determined by two processes not necessarily synchronized. Under the influence of HCG, fat is being extracted from the cells, in which it is stored in the fatty tissue. When these cells are empty and therefore serve no purpose, the body breaks down the cellular structure and absorbs it, but breaking up of useless cells, connective tissue, blood vessels, etc., may lag behind the process of fat-extraction. When this happens the body appears to replace some of the extracted fat with water which is retained for this purpose. As water is heavier than fat the scales may show no loss of weight, although sufficient fat has actually been consumed to make up for the deficit in the 500-Calorie diet. When then such tissue is finally broken down, the water is liberated and there is a sudden flood of urine and a marked loss of weight. This simple interpretation of what is really an extremely complex mechanism is the one we give those patients who want to know why it is that on certain days they do not lose, though they have committed no dietary error.

R1P2: Day 17 of VLCD

Weight: 267.8 lbs
Loss of: .2 lbs
Total Loss: 16.0 lbs

I'm a little befuddled on why I have slowed down SO MUCH.

I have been on protocol. I have drank a LOT of water. I have eaten foods that general help loss.
Now I know there are times when you slow down and loss inches, is that what others see too? 3rd week, and I have a 0, .4, .4, .2 loss.

Love the input.

Wednesday, August 26, 2009

R1P2: Day 16 of VLCD

Weight: 268 lbs
Loss of: .4 lbs
Total Loss: 15.8 lbs

So, I think it's the spinach. I tried the spinach on the 24th w/ veggie wash. Nope. Today I have loose bowels again. Sorry for TMI, but I'm frustrated w/ this. Though no spinach yesterday, and no lose bowel.

I will play with my menu some more. But I just feel the spinach is the bad guy.

I have enjoyed my food. yesterday I made a fish and tomato combo. YUM. It actually was really filling. Like a soup because the tomatoes juiced up a bit. I was asked what sauce I added w/ it, but I said it was simply the tomatoes. She then asked for a list of recipes I have been using.

I had Leaf lettuce w/ beef last night. Yum! I put 1/2 the lettuce aside to make a side salad for later snacking. Didn't need it though. I was just so satisfied.

I am a bit disappointed w/ the .4 loss. So it's been 0, .4, .4. I'm waiting for the 5lb loss!! hehe. Okay. I will take another 1.8 this week.

I thought i would have to cheat on Saturday at the BBQ, but was told that we bring our own meat. So no cheat needed for me. Doc and I had a plan. No plan needed now. I can save that card. (I think I already posted this? hmm I wish I had the option in my post to look at previous posts)

I would also like the option of following other peoples posts after I comment just in case someone responds to me in their blog. I want to make sure to follow up.

Today I am going to declutter the living room. My husband helped me declutter our dining area of toys this last weekend. Our son has TOO MANY toys and he keeps, okay we ALL keep tripping over stuff.
It's funny, I love that he gets these outside construction toys, but it has gotten to the point he can't even play in his dirt box. lol. But everyone loves giving him construction toys and it gets him outside.
I need to go back to my organization. I have a system that I have fallen behind. I make one thing my big hobby and the hcg has been that hobby so several things have gotten put on the back burner. :P

I know the hcg will become 'old hat' for me which will become part of my normal day so it won't take so much energy figuring things out, I will have my charts perfected.

OH- Dreaming has been WEIRD! 3 things in my DREAMS:
1. I went to a coffee shop, asked for sugar free chocolate treat in the coffee, but I started to drink and realized OH GOODNESS! MILK! So that was the end of that. Though when I woke up I could still taste the chocolate. Mmmmmmm

2. I sat with friends and was half way into an english muffin before I realized I just consumed Bread! NOooo. I quickly spit it out, and people looked at me. I told them it had adverse effects to my meds. LOL Even in my dreams I'm not being up front about the hCG. heh.

3. I was putting on a play, and all my actors were finishing up and I told them that 'tomorrows performance, then lets go have a serious cast party at my house, whole cast is invited!" then I realized. doh. I won't be able to drink!

I can't even have 'fun' in my dreams. hehe. But it really has permeated into my dreaming world. Amazing. I'm on protocol in my dreams! yeay! Now come weight loss! I wanna eat a slice of cheese! hehe

Tuesday, August 25, 2009

Poll! Cheese or Bread!

If you had to choose between cheese or bread which would it be?

This, a month ago, would have been like asking me cheese or chocolate. (I still don't have an answer for that one)

I find that I have HUGE bread cravings. But right now it's about the cheese. who cares about the bread.

Interesting find- The lady at the co-op said that the Candida is known for 'craving' bread. Now I like a good english muffin w/ warm butter, but I would rather sit down to a hunk of bree! I wonder if all this time its the Candida talking and not me. heh.

update- doctor visit

So I went to the doctors today. She is upping my morning dose of SL but lowering my night dose. She understands that it's a playing around trick. There is no 'one size fits all' (Unless we all lose weight and get into size 8 jeans! hehe)

We will see how it goes. Officially I lost 16 lbs on the office records. Yeay! 15.4 at home. heh.

anywho.

R1P2: Day 14 of VLCD

Weight: 268.4 lbs
Loss of: .4 lbs
Total Loss: 15 lbs

.4 loss after doing SO good yesterday. I also didn't get a big WHOOOSH drop after my period. Hmm. But I did keep losing during my TOM. I feel it has sort of slowed down after my TOM. hehe.

I drank 6 liters of water, and no broccoli.

I see the doctors today. I get to show her my progress, buy more hcg and talk to her about stuff.

I had crab with lettuce, and chicken with spinach last night. I washed the spinach really well with a veggie wash. I took my vitamin and potassium. I took 3 of the 99mg. I drank weightless tea as well.

Since my awesome doctor is pretty far away I need to get ready. I have take up a lunch with me this time too. That will be a first for me.

anywho

Monday, August 24, 2009

quick up date

I have finally come to the conclusion that Broccoli, as good as it is, will not work for me. I knew this but I didn't really groc it. Sigh. I enjoy Broccoli and would like to have more choices.

I went to my co-op today and they do not have asparagus because it is out of season. Now do I stick w/ whole foods that ARE in season? But that limits me, so I might just go to another store to pick some up.

I also got some weightless tea to help with any exercise water weight I retain. I'm taking out some big guns! :)

Yesterday was a bored day for me, I realized. Today was rather good, though I did off spice my dinner. Tried for a curry spinach thing. Too watery. oops. But I do enjoy a good curry.

I noticed I'm going through the cravings for food of another color. I want to lick my husbands plate for him. I want sour cream like there is no Tomorrow!!!! I swear I would love to take a one week break just to eat cheese. mmmm cheese.

Tomorrow I go to the doctors and find out exactly what it means to 'go the distance' and we will 'go all the way'. I want to know if she does a week break here and there? I really like that idea of dropping perhaps 35 lbs, then taking a week off or two to make sure I don't get immune too quickly. I'm so scared that I will hit immunity quickly and then I have to take a 6 week break. Grumble. Time will tell.
I'm off to watch a little tv w/ the hubby and finish my organic YUMMY orange. I kept it plain because it was so good. No OJ Julius for me tonight. (blend it w/ stevia vanilla YUM)

R1P2: Day 13 of VLCD

Weight: 268.8 lbs
Loss of: 1.8 lbs
Total Loss: 15 lbs

My first No loss day. I ate broccoli since I needed to mix it up a little. I wasn't feeling good for the last two days either. I didn't drink enough water either.
Its funny. I lost 15 lbs in the last two weeks, and a 'no loss' is a little stringing. heh. Oh well.

My goal for today- drink at least 5 liters of water, get some asparagus. Play around with it since I have it on my list. I also have zucchini on my list but I hear that is a general no-no. We were wondering if perhaps my spinach wasn't good. I have had loose bowels for the last two days. Its easy to play 'name that food' when you get only 4 to choose from. LOL. I did the broccoli purposefully. I should have expected this. I actually woke up thinking- this is the day I gain.

Tomorrow. Always tomorrow. I'm also going to work on putting activity of the exercise sort into my routine. I have a membership.

I'm sort of bumbed, but its not hitting me hard. I know that with a little more water eating the right things I will lose. Easy as that.

anywho

Sunday, August 23, 2009

R1P2: Day 12 of VLCD

Weight: 268.8 lbs - Skipped 269 all together
Loss of: 1.8 lbs
Total Loss: 15 lbs

Yesterday was a long day. Woke up okay, did some fun stuff, had our child stay over night with the grandparents so we could have a nice evening to ourselves. We went to bed late, and I nursed 1/2 grapefruit for maybe 3 hours. heh. I don't like going to bed too hungry. The thing is, we only get X amount of food, and this is most likely under the assumption of being awake X hours. The hCG has kept me satiated, if I go to bed 'on time' I feel completely fine the whole day, but when it stretches unreasonably, I make sure to 'ration' my food for a longer stretch. I think before the diet I would eat an extra meal at night because we sometimes stay up soooo late.

So, I am down to eating either lettuce or spinach. I need to find another veggie. I took out broccoli because it might cause weight gain. I don't like beat leaves, not sure about chards. I always mess them up so I don't eat it. I have a LOT of protein options so I feel good there. Honestly the two types of veggies haven't bothered me, but I hear you want to eat a wider variety. I do like the simplicity. I enjoy all the fruits listed. I have 4 to choose from. Not so hip on apples, my father used to go to farms and bring back HUGE boxes of apples, for a while there I thought it was the only fruit out there. heh.

I've been asked by my doctor to keep fruits 6 hours apart. If I know I will be up late, then it's no issue, but when Its 2-3pm I wonder. hmmm. But I figured it out. I will make sure to eat my lunch at 12noon, snack on a fruit around 2-4 or at 3 whole. Eat dinner at 6-7, Then a fruit snack around 9pm. My old diet habits have kicked in again and went 'how long can i hold out on eating' and I know that is NOT healthy. So a schedule will kick my butt into healthier actions.

I'm so excited to reach 15 lbs. This is the weight I told my doctor that I could lose before I see my parents. She knew i would lose more, I didn't. LOL. Even now, my goal weight has decreased to 135-140lbs instead of the 'hopeful 150'. With this diet I feel more confident that I can actually see below 200.

I'm having my favorite this morning- Taco Salad. :D P2 Style. SO YUMMY!! I'm defrosting some chicken to have tonight. Yum. Maybe something curry.

anywho

Saturday, August 22, 2009

R1P2: Day 11 of VLCD

Weight: 270.6 lbs
Loss of: 0.8 lbs
Total Loss: 13.2 lbs

I took Broccoli out of my diet, but I did go down to a .8 loss. I think I didn't drink enough water through out the day.

I had both lunch and dinner a bed of lettuce. I've been on a lettuce kick. But lunch I had chicken, and dinner I had shrimp.
I had some things I was engaged in so I didn't worry about making the shrimp too fancy. Just garlic and lemon. Which is very yummy.

I made a lot of dressing so all I need to do is drizzle that over the lettuce.

I had 1 fruit yesterday. I keep missing a 2nd fruit. But my 1st fruit happened at the end of the day.

Thursday, August 20, 2009

R1P2: Day 9 of VLCD - End of day

This morning:
Weight: 272.4 lbs
Loss of: 0.6 lbs
Total Loss:11.4 lbs

I looked back at my log, thank you Bella, and it seems that Broccoli might be the culprit. It seems that my .6 losses are the day after I had Broccoli. I seem to have a slightly different list of 'okay' foods. Melba Toast is not even on there, though I have to admit that is a good thing and should drop it anyways. I think this is why the doctor did that. But Broc and Cauli both made it on the list, which I hear some people can't have cabbage as well. I ate cabbage one day, and it wasn't cooked right so I found it less then tasteful.

Today I allowed myself to have Shrimp. I was holding off since I wanted to get through the fish in the fridge. Some of it gotten a bit too old (maybe 5 oz) and so I took the opportunity to get rid of it, and enjoy Shrimp. A Shrimp Salad with too much chili powder. I threw together garlic, some onion, chili powder and I think that was it. Threw it together in a pan to warm it up, then all on a bed of salad.

OH! I bought myself one of those Syrup things for Waffles. I couldn't seem to find a good spritzer for my dressings. It worked fine.

This week so far has been a good week. I feel perky and the sun shining on me. I dont' feel hungry for the most part. Yes I get hungry with dinner time, or lunch, but that is to be expected.

I went to the gym today to get measured. She was happy to see my weight loss and my 4 inches lost, but was weird about the fast progression. I told her I was taking some meds from the doctor and that was it, she seemed to move on quickly. I was thankful. I have run into people who are so darned nosy about everything that they give you the 20 questions. Complete strangers do not need to know about my love life! Or how many children I will be having, and how my numbers might be off?!? So this 'drop it before it even starts' felt good. I hate being rude and feel like I owe people explanations. You know what.. not everyone with everything needs an explanation!

My parents and I are going to see each other next weekend. I'm excited to see if they notice a difference. I think I have noticed it in my pants. They feel not as tight. Normally I got pants that sag a little below the knee, and above the waist but are TIGHT around the thigh. The pants I wore today sort of 'draped' Now honestly, it looked nice, but not sure how much of it was stretching of the pants, BUT I DON'T CARE! I'm taking it! My other pants I'm suppose to wear next year in Mexico... ya, they are almost dropping of me. They were lose to begin with so I had comfort, but now they are like obviously a size or two too big for me.

I had a friend ask what we wanted to wear for Halloween. I told him 'I'm done being silly things that didn't require size.. I want to wear something sort of sexy this time, if I can get to my size 18/16!" Last year I was 'Bird Flu' since I had a cold and wore a mask to a party. I stapled a bird beak on it, wore all orange and walked around. This year I was thinking 'Swine Flu' BUT that would be a 'fat' mentality I want to leave stranded on the side of the road. I don't want to wear 'fat' costumes. One year my hubby and I did sort of a 'big oil and president' thing, hubby a president, and me as big oil. I got to wear a big costume. I always look for 'big' costumes. This year I want to wear medium or large costumes, not BIG. I am totally into halloween. I tend to dye my hear black, wear a gothic outfit (still in my closet, don't have the heart to part w/ it) and MAYBE this year I might fit into it. I love giving out candy as a goth chick! The costume is as comfy as all get out. Oh, when I was skinny I used to wear a cat costume every year. Not slut kitty, but cute kitty. I had these ears and tail, wore spandex type pants and a black shirt. HOnestly it was cute on me, but when I added the pounds, it looked very SAD on me. heh.

anywho.

R1P2: Day 9 of VLCD

Weight yesterday: 273, loss of 1.4lbs

This morning:
Weight: 272.4 lbs
Loss of: 0.6 lbs
Total Loss:11.4 lbs

I've done a sort of .6, 1.4, .6, 1.4 loss. not complaining, find it intersting.

I've forgotten a fruit for the last two days. one in the morning a day ago, and one in the evening last night. I went to be SUPER early to wake up at 5am to drive a friend to the airport. It's summer Its summer, I thought the sun would be up already. nope. heh.

This is going to be a bit of a test for me, I will come home and sleep again.

I've been doing these iced coffees in the morning w/ vanilla stevia. Yummy. I tried also drinking 5-6 liters of water to see if the weight would possibly be tied to my water, but seems not totally. I also ate a steak last night. lean, but there was some small viens of fat me thinks! Sigh. I couldn't cut them out properly but it wasn't much. I've sort of been tuckered out of seafood. I had cod with rosemary, lemon, and garlic. yummy once I ate w/ with some broccoli mixed with vinegar and seasonings, but going into the kitchen hasn't been 'yeay, fish!" heh. I just need to keep mixing it up.

It's funny, I think I have lost some inches around my top stomach, which actually makes me look more pregnant because its 'rounder' not big and flat. the sides are melting away so it looks like I have more pronounced stomach. Makes my stomach look like a thinner person becoming fat.

I'm not really feeling hungry at all anymore. There are moments when I get a little peckish, but that is also 3-4 hours after my last meal and I'm bored. If I keep busy I'm surprisingly never hungry.

Okay- off to shower and take friends to the airport!

Wednesday, August 19, 2009

Little website I saw

http://operationbeautiful.com/

I thought it was a cute little site. What a neat idea.

-steffi

R1P2: Day 7 of VLCD

Weight: 274.4 lbs
Loss of: 0.6 lbs
Total Loss: 9.4 lbs

Oh. I hope to tip the scale or rather see the scale at a 10 lb loss tomorrow, but I don't want to jinx it.

I had coffee frap for breakfast- Coffee, crushed ice, and vanilla stevia. yum.

Lunch: Taco Salad like I had yesterday. OMG good! My favorite meal by far.
Old style taco salad: Fritos, meat, salsa, cheese.
New style Taco salad: Bed of lettuce, spicied up meat and a vinegar dressing.

Dinner. I whipped up a chicken spicy curry. I wasn't expecting it to be so hot. I think w/o the coconut milk it's spicier. yowzer.

Every since my break down of understanding what has been keeping me depressed I've felt full of sunshine honestly. Its been a bright day of doing things. It's been nice to feel up beat and happy. I'm very curious what my weight loss will be light after i'm done with TOM.

I have so enjoyed making meals. I realize that I want to make such meals all the time but am too lazy. I don't start preparing till its too late hunger wise and end up microwaving some frozen stuff or dump 3 or 4 cans of 'stuff' together to make some stew/casserole. SO MUCH processed food in our diet. YUCK. I don't like the stuff because I know it's not that healthy, but its so 'right there' to cook. I told the hubby to eat what you want, but we will slowly move that crap outta the house.

We got containers to put stuff in, and I split up all the food. I feel very organized. I have a plan. I have a chicken box, a beef box, and fish box. I have enjoyed the beef a lot and makes me wanna slow down on all the fish I ate. I have still a bunch more to eat that is int he fridge before I allow myself the shrimp I bought. A bunch of stuff frozen so I can take bits out. Lots of broccoli and spinach to feed a family of 10. heh.

We are taking pictures of me pretty regularly. I want to take them each 10 lbs. Then do a montage. :D that would be fun if I can get myself in a similar position by the kitchen and then see the fat 'melt' away.

I've been playing around with making a short film about the path I'm on. I did one when I was pregnant for a film class I took and it turned out better then expected. So I might start capturing footage to work with when I get close to my goal weight.

That's it for tonight I think. I'm curious if my chiropractor will notice anything tomorrow. Though he didn't seem to notice my recent upswing in weight, or he was just being nice. hehe. Though I guess what is 10 lbs really on a fat gal. :P

anywho

Monday, August 17, 2009

R1P2: Day 6 of VLCD

Weight: 275 lbs
Loss of: 1.4 lbs
Total Loss: 8.8 lbs


Breakfast: Grapefruit

Lunch: Iceburg lettuce, .5 oz diced cucumber, .50z onion, crab w/a mix of paprika, lemon, and some other seasonings. Warmed up the crab and then mixed it into the salad. I couldn't finish it.

Dinner: Not sure yet. I think I might have a steak with broccoli. Some fresh, slightly steamed broccoli.

I bought a whole load of stuff at Costco, I think I have enough for a month, and ONLY bought 1 big top round (very lean), fresh organic chicken- 6 breasts (gave some of them to hubby), and lots of frozen seafood. Shrimp, crab, and cod. I have some taliapia left. I bet I have enough to take me through the next 3 weeks AT LEAST. I also got a huge bag of spinage (main choice of veggie lately) and a big bag of broccoli already cut. Yeay! heh. Maybe more expensive perhaps, but at this point, i'm not eating a whole lot, so I will fancy it up w/ precut.

Doing really good today. My mood has lightened up immensely. I was a little scared to leave the house w/o any food, but I wasn't going to be gone long and I actually wasn't at all hungry. I was around a bunch of food, and actually got grossed out by a lot of it. That has been the weird turn of events for me. No real cravings. I don't want anything really. I do obsess about the food I think a little because I'm always thinking "What am I going to make next" But now I have everything cut into 3.5 oz packs, put most inf the freezer, some in the fridge and now I can make a little menu plan. I think I will print off a list of recipes. I plan on making a jar of dressing for various things so I don't always have to put it all together last moment. Now I can focus on other things.

I'm actually sort of proud of the 8.8 pounds so far. I haven't lost that much in a consistant way for a LONG time. I don't think since I was pregnant (3 years ago) have I actually lost any weight in that amount. I might do 5 lbs.. gain 3, then loss 5 again, so I am down 2, and then back up. To think that I will be seeing the 260's next week some times. That totally BLOWS my mind. I thought about it. I was 275 when I conceived. I was 257 (the lowest in about 8 years) when I had my child. Hence why my doctor knew this was the diet for me.
By the start of next month I could be around my lowest weight in the last 8 years. WoW. Just amazed.
I'm also amazed actually that I'm down even though it's my time of month. Suppose to stop. I hope I don't get all giddy thinking I can lose every month during 'that time of month' heh.

I really moved my body today. I think that helps to just get me unfocused from the diet for a while. I've been making it my life since there is a lot to think about and plan around.

anywho!

Sunday, August 16, 2009

Side Note:

So I broke down to my friends yesterday and told them what I was doing. It was intersting. I had one friend who said to me "oh.. my friends girlfriend is doing it too".. and then "So, where do I sigh up?"
I gave him more information about it. He has a trusted doctor he goes to so he will talk it over with his doctor and we will see what comes of it. We both tried losing weight together but it just didn't work out. (no pun intended). It would be fun to have him much slimer. I think it might help w/ some of his health problems, and I know he has some image issues that he would resolve by being thinner. He is such a dear friend and Iwon't push him, I realllly hope he will consider it, and then go on it! I would so have him over for dinner every night! :) heh

R1P2: Day 5 of VLCD

Today I woke up to a wonderful looking scale.

Weight: 276.4 (a weight I have been playing with for the last several months)
Lost: 1.6 lbs
Total Loss: 7.4 Waaaahooo! I have never lost this much weight in such a short amount of time. I might do 5 lbs up and down, I think I have attachment issues. ;) heh. But then maybe 4 more here and there. Mostly up though.

Breakfast: Coffee and then lingered with some grapefruit. I've realllly enjoyed grapefruit in the morning. (not sure if this is problematic for blood sugar long term? Any thoughts?

Lunch: Got really hungry, made chicken and broccoli. Yummy. I put garlic, dill and vinegar.

Dinner: Spinach and Talapia. Did something new: Mustard powder (love it more then sqeeze), pepper, oregano, and too much cayanne pepper. Yaaaahoooo. heh. Spicy! But nice. Let the hubby try some, he had to excuse himself it was too much for his mouth. heh.

I had to get away from each meal being either chili or vinegar w/ dill. I love it, but see I can will get bored with it.
I think of all all the people I can't wait to show 'thinner' pictures to. My brothers and their family. I know many will be so happy/proud of me. Some people in Germany that are dear to me and have treated me like i'm their niece. The husband has always been on my case to lose weight. He had diabetes and sees my quick road there. I think he might be so astonished when he sees me even 50 pounds lighter. I will personally fly to his home (oh goodness. hubby just made popcorn for our kid. My BIGGEST weakness. mmmm the smell!), knock on their door and go 'tada' if I get to 140lbs. hehe.

I don't buy into the charts that say for a short person you should weight 135. (oh nos, I just found out I have been demoted to 5'2") My target is actually 125. Like I could get there. lol. I have NEVER seen that after high school. I don't know if it could be right for my frame? I will be happy to be around 150. All extra will be cream. (we have a lot of 'food sayings' in our vocabulary)

I love the fact that this protocol will also distribute my fat. Not just slim me. I'm so excited because I have a nice hour glass figure, but then my thighs are concidered in my eyes as 'thunger thighs' Grumble. When I can wear 1 size on top, most of the time I have to wear one size +1 on the bottom. And most of the time the waist is all loss, but my thigh area is TIGHT. I hate the way my pants sit on me. I just have weird weight on the bottom and its not normal at all. I carry it all in my behind and thights. So I am excited to see it slim that out and put it elsewhere to look good. heh. :)

anywho. More later. Thanks for the comments I got so far! :) always encouraging.

Saturday, August 15, 2009

4th day of VLCD

So, I had an okay day.

Weight: 278 lbs
Loss of: 0.8 lbs
Total Loss: 5.8 lbs

Both days I have had 1/2 a grapfruit. That seems to be a favorite trend of mine personally. I am loving a nice 1/2 grapefruit in the morning. So refreshing. I put 3 drops of the orange stevia drops and it's like eating a pink grapefruit.

Lunch: I made a quick lunch because our friends where over, so I made Spinach w/ Chicken cooked up. Crumbled them in. Yummy.

I have been using this vinegar, dill, lemon sauce almost every day. Its been very tasty with most of my dishes!

Dinner: Tialapia and Broccoli. I loved it. The bright white and green made the dish look attractive to the eyes while tasting yummy in the mouth. I had garlic (which has become my best friend), dill, 1/4 lemon squeeze. Baked the fished, and microwaved the broccoli on 2 min. Yummy.

I think I will have strawberries again for dessert. Mmmmm. Fresh strawberries.


What has made meals so intersting is that they have more of a gourmet feel to them, so I feel that I am really enjoying making it (the closet chef in me) and eating a LOT of fish. The hubby doesn't like fish, so it used to be that I would make stuff we both eat, and not make 2 seperate meals. But now I have to for the most part make my own meals, and let hubby figure out what he wants. He said he has actually reduced a lot of his portion sizes since watching me cook.

I've been a little bummed out this morning. Some minor depression. I took a bath and just thought about it all. I think I figured it out. I'm scared. This might be 'too good to be true' though it's very hard work. No free lunch here. But to think, this might actually be the medical answer to my weight issues.
To think. In a year from now I could be down my 100+ plus pounds and sitting in a bikini at some beach and not look like a beached whale. Going to a foreign country really makes you feel like a Fat American. NOT attractive. So to 'fit in' or rather 'blend in' is making me really get excited about the endline. That all this hard work will pay off.

Eating 500 calories a day isn't easy because at the begining its all new, it's restrictive and it takes some thinking about what you have. But we have a lot of options for me, many different mixtures and I'm getting into the seasonings. I realize that the portions really are the size that my mom eats (she is thin) so it's not like I"m having to eat TINY.. or ABNORMALLY small. W/ the medication it seems that it makes it less hard because you won't be hungry while eating so few calories.
The food has been freeing for me because I can eat things I really enjoy and I have fun playing with the food choices. I am going to create my own list of recipes that I will enjoy. Its fun pouring into a bowl vinegar and then a bunch of spices. I can make hCG protocol approved 'rubs' for my meals. That is where the 'go for the spice of life' comes in. hehe.

I think my big breakthrough moment will be when I have acheived 25 pounds lost, and can fit into the next smaller sized pants. (if I have any left in the house) Then this will be a 'pinch me I'm in a dream' moment. Oh wait.. don't pinch me! hehe.

anywho

Friday, August 14, 2009

3rd day on the hCG VLCD (very low calorie Diet)

I lost a total of 5 pounds. 3.6 yesterday and 1.4 this morning.

8/13:
Breakfast: 1/2 grapefruit
Lunch: Tuna w/ cucumbers choppped into it, A big bed of spinach with a awesome vinegar salad dressing I got from my doctor. That was one of the most amazing lunches I have had. wow. I will add that to my normal day's lunch.
Dinner: (didn't work as well) Cabbage w/ vinegar (didn't get it right somehow) and Sole w/ dill, lemon, garlic and other flavors. Not bad.

I messed up on the cabbage somehow, but still ate it, it was a bit more vinegar then I really would have liked though. Next time. I know my mom adds vinegar, salt, peper and bacon pieces. But I thought it would still hold a yummy punch w/o the bacon. I'll think about that one again. hehe.

I was a bit hungry yesterday, but not as bad as the 1st VLCD. I do find it weird that I look at what my hubby has for dinner and I'm not even the slightest jealous or craving it. I would rather just be full spontanicously then eat what he was having. I'm finding that I'm NOT craving food, which is actually the opposite to my normal mode. Not sure if I Loaded on enough stuff, I have been told that sort of 'wears off'.

I put up a sheet of paper to put stickers on for each pound I have lost. I think that will be a great visual cue to all the pounds I'm losing.

Also- Time of Month (TOM) is apon me, I hear that means I will slow way down on loseing. We will see how it works. I should have an increase of loss the moment I am done w/TOM.

One of the things I was somewhat expecting was this flush of 'something' come over me as the medication goes into my system, but I feel pretty.. normal. I'm not seeing some HUGE change in how I feel. Maybe that is a great thing. But somehow I was excepting birds to start chirping at my window, the deer to sing while I cook. Nope, Not happening. But maybe that is really okay.

Wednesday, August 12, 2009

1st day of hCG

So, I woke up 'by accident' at 7:30am. I wanted to sleep in so 'awake' time was to a minimum. I went downstairs, peed, weighted myself: 283.8
I was actually done after taking hCG for the 2nd day and loading. I must not have loaded well. haha. Sigh.

I had a 1/2 grapefruit since I started to feel sick. I conditioned my body during the week of loading to eat in the morning.
I was able to take a bath and then go back to sleep for a little while longer, woke up from a horrid nightmare- something about being allergic to the medication. Lets leave it at that. I'm not of course.

For lunch I made talapia fish and onions (bad choice) with a dill, garlic water, 1/2 lemon mixture. The onions were then thrown in with the fish and broiled? I let that finish up but the onions were as white as the fish and it looked bland. It tasted okay but onions soaked in water is never a great choice. I should have used zuccini or something. I want to be careful w/ using tomatoes too much. Though I could eat one every day. I could even use that as my fruit! hehe.

By around 4pm I was hungry, I made sure I could eat little bits at a time and not all at once w/ the receptionist at my doctors office. The poor gal got plenty of quick 'oh, can I do this" phone calls from me, what a lifesaver though!! :) I cut an apple into little pieces and ate maybe 2 slices total? Then I got the idea to put some vanilla stevia and cinnomon over it and bake it on 'toast 4' in our toaster oven. Keeping that as a dessert.

By 5:30 I said "forget it" i'm just too hungry to wait for dinner. I took 3.5 oz of 4% beef, 3.5 oz of tomatoes and cut them up. browned the beef.
Added a whole lot of seasonings. I think Garlic will be my BESTfriend! I didn't have chilipowder (which I swore I had) and instead used some curry, paprika, and more garlic powder, plus some italian seasonings that only had good stuff. I had a taco seasoning but it has MILK?!? in it???!? Sigh. So I can't use that. Hubby told me to write down all the seasonsings we will need though.
I put it all together and put enough water in there to make a simple 'broth' that will help fill me up.

I hear that the first week CAN be tough for some people. I guess I'm one of them so far. We plan on getting some carbonated water, of course the store we went to had them on sale and where out. :(
What was sort of humourous was that my grocery bill was slightly higher for the week, (we did get vitamins and others though) I could put ALL my weeks worth of grocery in 1 bag. :D I love it!
I'm now slurping up my soup/chili food and enjoying every bite!! Yeay!

I'll get the hang of this, and will need to, when not hungry, go through some recipes to make intersting dishes. Some of them I think I will eat when not on the protocol since they were a bit yummy like tonights meal.

Tuesday, August 11, 2009

Today is 2nd day on hCG.
Weight: I'm all over the board right now. I weighed at various times, but I don't know what the best 'starting' weight is.

So Sunday 10:30 am : 280.6 at pre-Loading loading day
Monday 10:30pm: 281.3 Loading
Tuesday 10:00am: 280.4 Loading - but finding it hard.

I'm suppose to load today. I got my prenatal vitamin, need to pick up potassium by tomorrow for VLCD. Gonna have me some bacon and eggs for breakfast. I'm eating 1/2 grapefruit right now to get things started.

I think I will need to eat something in the morning because I feel sort of sick. I had 'trained' my body when I was detoxing to not really eat breakfast, but for the last week of pre-loading loading I have had full breakfasts. How quickly the body adapts to that. Sigh.

I don't feel like this total zany awesome change, like something would come over my body, but I'm being very sensitive to it. Any little sound my body makes im like "is that the meds?" heh.

I don't want to eat though. Seeing that little bit of weight loss makes me just want to start today, luckily I'm getting a little nudge from the husband asking me to make sure I load today! It's hard though. I'm so ready to lose!!!!!

Monday, August 10, 2009

Today is my first day to take hCG, then 2 more load days. I'm done loading. heh. Mentally that is. I do have some things in the fridge to 'clean out' but I'm simply ready to LOSE!!!!

I will work on getting all my measurements and a final starting weight.
Yesterday I think I went up to 280.4 on my Wii. I'm not a fan of the Wii when I gain. I get asked a dozen questions, and if you lose too much they tell you to slow down. I'm almost tempted to go out and buy a normal scale.

Saturday, August 8, 2009

In the midst with globs of Fat!

I have to now eat a ton of fatty foods. I have tried for the most part to limit to bacon and such, ate some salmon.
I am sort of delighting in ice cream and various pies. I think I am ready for the diet, though I know my hubby thinks I haven't loaded enough for these several days. I ate today 3 big huge mounds of fruit salad. I will have a steak tonight with more stuff.

It's hard since I feel like general crap when I do it. I haven't been sleeping great. I can see how even physiologically this diet is amazing. It makes you sick of all the foods you might have eaten in the past with gloriousness. I also find it hard to 'gain weight' right when I have had enough of that, and now want to lose!!!!

Anywho.

Wednesday, August 5, 2009

Stepping onto the field

I have been given the okay by my doctor to move forward and start on the hCG Protocol.

It started when I got some great Health Insurance, went to my doctor for a full physical and blood work. I went back to get the results knowing I would be asked to eat better and lose some weight.

She said that she seems mostly 'soft numbers' that will turn into 'hard numbers' in about a year. She let me know that my pancreas is not in good condition and that something needs to happen. Since my doctor is awesome and would never prescribe something bad I asked her to help me. I wanted drastic and now. I told her I would compromise with her if she could put me on something now and then in 20 -40 lbs I would go on my own. She picked up her chart, looked at something and said.. "Well, I've got another idea"

She is so good at telling me to 'eat this' and 'eat that' and you will become healthier. She did right by me during my pregnancy and kept me off insulin (unlike a lot of my other friends w/ other doctors). So when she told me about "hCG Protocol" I was very trusting of her and checked it out.

She is going to help me with it. So yesterday I went again to her to work on an official plan. Since she knows me very well and knows my body now for X amount of years, she told me to start 'loading' now. WHooHoo! Though in truth, not as easy as it sounds. I find years of my 'don't eat that you'll get fat and die" mantra is making it hard, Though I did have a 2 egg cooked in oil, and mayo sandwich still tasty this morning. :) heh.

I'm going to load on 'fat' foods, not sugar and carbs. I got that advice from the receptionist who did load on carbs and sugars as well, and feels she suffered w/ cravings the first week more then she wanted.

I will load on eggs, steak, cheese, nuts and any other high fat items I can find. I will also allow myself to eat 1 whole cheese cake this week. Not all in one sitting, but I will buy one today and slowly work on it as I see fit. Yes, it has sugar, but int he sceme of all things, I think that will be okay. I really filled my coffee w/ milk today. Though I have already switched to Stevia.

My weight: 283. The highest I have been in my life. And that is with constant 'eat right and exercise' heh.

I finally gave up spiritually on dieting about a year ago when I worked out 5 days a week, treadmilled 900 calories a day away, and ate right. I lost only 3-4 pounds. I was on birth control which gets you to gain 10 lbs easily. So, Yes, I staved off 10 lbs from gain, but it still wasn't good for moral. Especially another woman who did it the same as me and lost 10-15 lbs in that month doing the same thing.

So we will see.
Next monday I go back to my doctor and get the first dose of hCG and Wed I start the VLCD. I'm scared and excited. I'm scared to eat all this fat and somehow be the ONLY person in the world that won't lose a pound and end up 5 pounds heavier. heh. I told my doctor that I would like to be down a little by the time my parents come back from vacation. She asked "how much you think you could lose?" I said maybe 15 lbs. She wanted that goal in writing. She feels so incredibly confident that if I don't cheet and do it right, I will lose more. She had that confidence about her when I was writing the "15 lbs by end of Aug"

Also- I get to load at my kids b-day party. Which is funny because I planned to provide wheat free/ gluten free cupcakes w/ a low sugar icing and lots of fruit and veggies. hehe. I want my kid to grow thinking that b-day parties are about the poeple, not cake and ice cream and all that fatty things that typically get associated w/ such things.