Stepping onto the field

I have been given the okay by my doctor to move forward and start on the hCG Protocol.

It started when I got some great Health Insurance, went to my doctor for a full physical and blood work. I went back to get the results knowing I would be asked to eat better and lose some weight.

She said that she seems mostly 'soft numbers' that will turn into 'hard numbers' in about a year. She let me know that my pancreas is not in good condition and that something needs to happen. Since my doctor is awesome and would never prescribe something bad I asked her to help me. I wanted drastic and now. I told her I would compromise with her if she could put me on something now and then in 20 -40 lbs I would go on my own. She picked up her chart, looked at something and said.. "Well, I've got another idea"

She is so good at telling me to 'eat this' and 'eat that' and you will become healthier. She did right by me during my pregnancy and kept me off insulin (unlike a lot of my other friends w/ other doctors). So when she told me about "hCG Protocol" I was very trusting of her and checked it out.

She is going to help me with it. So yesterday I went again to her to work on an official plan. Since she knows me very well and knows my body now for X amount of years, she told me to start 'loading' now. WHooHoo! Though in truth, not as easy as it sounds. I find years of my 'don't eat that you'll get fat and die" mantra is making it hard, Though I did have a 2 egg cooked in oil, and mayo sandwich still tasty this morning. :) heh.

I'm going to load on 'fat' foods, not sugar and carbs. I got that advice from the receptionist who did load on carbs and sugars as well, and feels she suffered w/ cravings the first week more then she wanted.

I will load on eggs, steak, cheese, nuts and any other high fat items I can find. I will also allow myself to eat 1 whole cheese cake this week. Not all in one sitting, but I will buy one today and slowly work on it as I see fit. Yes, it has sugar, but int he sceme of all things, I think that will be okay. I really filled my coffee w/ milk today. Though I have already switched to Stevia.

My weight: 283. The highest I have been in my life. And that is with constant 'eat right and exercise' heh.

I finally gave up spiritually on dieting about a year ago when I worked out 5 days a week, treadmilled 900 calories a day away, and ate right. I lost only 3-4 pounds. I was on birth control which gets you to gain 10 lbs easily. So, Yes, I staved off 10 lbs from gain, but it still wasn't good for moral. Especially another woman who did it the same as me and lost 10-15 lbs in that month doing the same thing.

So we will see.
Next monday I go back to my doctor and get the first dose of hCG and Wed I start the VLCD. I'm scared and excited. I'm scared to eat all this fat and somehow be the ONLY person in the world that won't lose a pound and end up 5 pounds heavier. heh. I told my doctor that I would like to be down a little by the time my parents come back from vacation. She asked "how much you think you could lose?" I said maybe 15 lbs. She wanted that goal in writing. She feels so incredibly confident that if I don't cheet and do it right, I will lose more. She had that confidence about her when I was writing the "15 lbs by end of Aug"

Also- I get to load at my kids b-day party. Which is funny because I planned to provide wheat free/ gluten free cupcakes w/ a low sugar icing and lots of fruit and veggies. hehe. I want my kid to grow thinking that b-day parties are about the poeple, not cake and ice cream and all that fatty things that typically get associated w/ such things.